Mom2Mom: Voices in His Head? Not So Much

Illustration by Michael Rushbrook

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AUGUSTA, Ga. — This Mom2Mom column appears in November 2016 Augusta Family Magazine.

One of my favorite gadgets is a little Bluetooth speaker I picked up while traveling over the summer. I can have my Gino Vannelli tunes anywhere with no cords plugged into anything…and no earbuds.

My little round Skullcandy went on vacation with me, to the pool with me and it always accompanies me when I’m showering and dressing in the mornings.

So one evening I was watching TV with my daughter, doing what everybody does these days when watching TV—looking at our phones, checking our Facebook and Twitter feeds. She would read me a funny comment, a few minutes later I’d share a post with her—you know how that goes.

I came across a picture of Mike Rowe, the guy with the great voice who does lots of commercials and some kind of a “dirty jobs” show. He was holding a letter from his mom, and it looked like there was a video link.

Well I was messing around with it, complaining about being totally frustrated with my new phone update (Sky has totally tuned me out at this point)…and kept pressing the link but nothing was happening.

“Hey baby,” I said as I handed my phone to her, “see if you can make this volume work. I have been pushing the sound as loud as it will go but I can’t hear anything.”

She looked at the screen and said, “Yep, he’s definitely saying something—but I have no idea why we can’t hear it.”

At that moment a startled-looking Scott stormed into the den. My husband had been upstairs sleeping.

“That was NOT FUNNY!” he shouted from the doorway. “Were you trying to give me a heart attack?”

“What are you TALKING ABOUT?” I demanded.

“I thought someone was in our bathroom,” he explained. “A deep voice was getting louder and louder—I’m lying there in the dark thinking a man is in our bathroom.”

Sky and I burst out laughing! Our efforts to hear Mike Rowe, playing with the volume buttons, it was all happening upstairs in my bathroom on that cool little Bluetooth speaker!!

Music wouldn’t have alarmed a sleeping Scott…but a man’s voice—TALKING—was completely unexpected. (imagine emoticon with tears running down cheeks here!)

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